Journaling for Change This Movember

Alongside Remembrance Day (Veterans Day in the U.S.) and American Thanksgiving, November brings opportunities to reflect on men’s mental health. With International Men’s Day on November 19 and the entire month dedicated to Movember, this is a time to consider the unique struggles men face—particularly those who fall through the cracks of support systems.

For years, I worked in the Violence Against Women (VAW) sector, helping women who were trying to leave abusive situations. Our goal was to create a “bubble” of support—a network of shelters, legal aid, counseling, and financial guidance to help women rebuild their lives. I saw firsthand how life-changing these resources could be. But I also know that many women leave abusive relationships alone, without any support system, and even those who seek help may find shelters full, leaving them to face impossible choices on their own.

When it comes to men—especially those who have been abusive—there is often no “bubble” at all. No guidance, no system to help them understand their actions, process their pain, or develop healthier coping mechanisms. Many are left isolated and angry, perhaps facing legal consequences but without any constructive support to help them change. Without intervention or introspection, too many of these men go on to repeat the cycle of harm with someone else. And if children are involved, they may still have contact with their ex-partner and kids, which allows them to continue creating turmoil and distress in the lives of those they’ve hurt.

This isn’t to say we should feel sorry for men who’ve caused harm; accountability is crucial. Reflecting on my own experience, I know firsthand what it’s like to have lived with someone who refuses to take responsibility. My ex-husband never admitted fault, never acknowledged the pain he caused. It took me 16 years and multiple court appearances to receive even a small amount of child support, and it trickled in so infrequently that it never made a dent in daily financial needs. Organizations like White Ribbon and Movember are doing incredible work to address this gap, challenging toxic masculinity, raising awareness, and encouraging men to take action.

Had my ex-husband sought support to confront his issues, he could have played a meaningful role in his daughter’s life. Despite my efforts to include him—bi-monthly visits, birthdays, graduations—he always found an excuse. Emergencies would suddenly come up, or he’d send his parents in his place. The result was that he and our daughter never had a relationship to speak of. His unresolved anger and tendency to blame others left him estranged from the one person who would have benefited most from his presence.

One of the tools that has helped me immensely in my own healing journey is journaling. It’s become a constant in my life—a safe place to process, reflect, and find moments of gratitude, even on the hardest days. I truly believe that journaling can be a powerful tool for anyone looking to make changes or understand themselves better, and that includes men. That’s why I created a series of journals, each with a mustache-themed cover (and even a few featuring my favorite French bulldogs rocking colourful 'staches!). My hope is that these journals bring a bit of fun into the process and serve as a gentle reminder that self-care doesn’t have to feel like a chore.

Society often teaches men to “tough it out,” but real strength isn’t about pushing emotions aside. Sometimes, the bravest thing you can do is to sit with what you feel.

If you’re new to journaling, there’s no need to overthink it. Start small—just jot down one thing that went well today, a challenge you faced, or something you’d like to work on tomorrow. A couple of sentences is all it takes to create a space where you can clear your head and sharpen your focus. Think of it like a daily check-in—a way to step back, regroup, and keep yourself on track.

This Movember, consider giving journaling a try or gifting a journal to someone who could benefit from a bit of space to reflect and grow. These journals are available on Amazon worldwide, making them easy to access. You can view the full range on my product page, or click on any of the images above to go directly to the Amazon listing.

Real change starts within, and sometimes, all it takes is a pen, a piece of paper, and the courage to look a little closer at what’s inside.